Posted on Sunday, March 29, 2009 by Stacy
Well Kathy the foreign correspondent and I are back from Pat's wonderful lesbian performance!
What Kath? No I didn't write it wrong-Oh. Thespian. I meant Thespian performance.
Anyway on the way down there we kept coming across signs that read SAVE PONTIAC PRISON which we thought were interesting but then after a few miles we found ones that read SAVE PONTIAC PRISON with a big white X crossed out on them and painted at the bottom was THIS WAY KATHY AND STACY with an arrow pointing down a road.
That had razor wire lining it.
Well, we heard this Conklins Barn II dinner theatre was off the beaten path but we DID NOT think it was going to be so hard to get in!
I mean a full cavity body search to watch a play? I'm sorry but that's just going a little too far on the security for my taste.
Come to think of it though, Kathy did seem to enjoy it.
Her usher looked like Brad Pitt's cuter brother... but for some reason he was dressed in a blue uniform with a badge and handcuffs. Strange. Well, anyway she was smiling from ear to ear when she came out and wanted a cigarette after she came out of the coat check room.
I don't know what she was smiling about because my coat check room was incredibly small and airless --and does NOT have one hanger, much less a coat rack in it!
Long story short, after the fingerprinting, hair samples, smears from membranes that I'm not going to discuss here, the nice men at the entrance explained to us that they were the mere GATEKEEPERS to the theatre grounds and gave us lovely electronic bracelets to wear around our ankles as they escorted us back to the car and got us on our way!
Pat SO knows how to treat friends that come down to see him is all I can say!!
Well after wandering around a soybean field, helping birth a cow, and grabbing a quick latte at the circle K, we finally found the theatre! And was Pat's show convincing! He kept sobbing and pointing to our table.
Let me tell you, it is so gratifying to see an old friend so emotional to see us. Some people just bury those feelings down, down, down.....until they either open a vein or begin having long, involved discussions with a qualified licenced mental health care professional-
Where was I?
Ah, yes, Patrick's play! It was a wonderful evening of laughs watching terrific actors and is an experience I would certainly recommend to everyone. Pat is an excellent actor and is extremely funny, not to mention very dashing. His fellow cast members couldn't have been more professional and brought unexpected laughs from every door on that stage!
The Barn has a delicious dinner buffet that will knock your socks off! The wait service is polite, gracious and welcoming after they remove the lace thongs, DD bra's and men's underwear they took out of our pockets.
And though they refused to let us sit next no closer than 40 feet from the stage....we bear them no ill will.
In a nutshell it was definitely worth the trip and we will definitely be back for more!
As soon as they give us their new address. They kindly explained to us that they have had several bomb threats and will be moving to somewhere in the Southwestern United States right after the show and will not be there if we come back.
Tsk. What is this world coming to?