Posted on Friday, November 21, 2008 by Stacy
Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!
Weekend Diversion: 1986, Part 16
4 days ago
My eyes, my eyes!
Posted on Friday, November 21, 2008 by Melanie
While recording Episode 50, Taylor mentioned that he kinda missed our Secrets of the Industry bits, so I figured I'd let you all in on an issue I'm facing as a jobbing genre writer.
I just received an invitation to an funny fantasy antho about vampires in the suburbs (and seeing as I couldn't make earlier invitations, come hell or high water I WILL deliver a manuscript for this one). For once, the Muse cooperated and dropped a blindingly hilarious concept for a parody on my head.
Said concept, however, required that I at least leaf through...well, let's just say that it's a certain monster bestseller aimed at the young adult crowd...in order to get more details on what it is that I'm parodying. I knew the general plot, of course, but it's always good to have specific things that you can point to (or at) and laugh. So the book was purchased, I started to read...
...and had to stop on the second page because, oh merciful Aunt Granny, I found myself giggling because I dared not cry. Well, that and I threw up in my mouth a little. The adverbs! The flowery language! The heroine whose head I want to hold underwater until she stops acting like a ninny! Even though I'm obviously supposed to identify with her because she's so beautiful (although she doesn't know it) and smart (although she doesn't ackowledge it) and special (see prior parenthetical comment) and self-sacrificing (yadda yadda).
Come to think of it, holding her under until she stopped wriggling altogether might be a better choice.
And to think I gave up reading fanfic because I couldn't take the Mary Sues anymore. Oh, what's a Mary Sue, you ask? Well, Gentle Reader, allow me to cut and paste a definition from Wikipedia:
Mary Sue, sometimes shortened simply to Sue, is a pejorative term used to describe a fictional character who plays a major role in the plot and is particularly characterized by overly idealized and hackneyed mannerisms, lacking noteworthy flaws, and primarily functioning as wish-fulfillment fantasies for their authors. Perhaps the single underlying feature of all characters described as "Mary Sues" is that they are too ostentatious for the audience's taste, or that the author seems to favor the character too highly. The author may seem to push how exceptional and wonderful the "Mary Sue" character is on his or her audience, sometimes leading the audience to dislike or even resent the character fairly quickly; such a character could be described as an "author's pet".
(And in this particular case, extremely clumsiness isn't a flaw so much as the author's attempt to distract us by saying, "Look, she's not perfect, so obviously she's not a Mary Sue!" Denial ain't just a river in Egypt, honey...).
Obviously, I made the wrong choice when it came to writing genre fiction. I should have tried writing Mary Sues, setting them in the supernatural framework du jour, then I could just sit back and watch the money come rolling in.
I'd feel like a whore, of course. But a well-paid one.
Bless the author's heart, though -- at least she's making money in a business where it's rare as hen's teeth to make a living wage. And if nothing else, I'm having a very, VERY good time writing this parody.
DQYDJ 50: It's A Trainwreck!
Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2008 by Melanie
Welcome to Episode 50 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Patrick entertains fantasies of being the meat in a Hot Italian/Cuban Sandwich, Jerry is on a plane somewhere, Melanie explains how she fell backwards down a flight of stairs and Stacy sounds just a tad Skypey. And if that's not enough to blow your hair back, we welcome Taylor the Latte Boy as our special Anniversary Guest!
- We have email!
- Kathy
- We have voicemail!
- Taffy Carlisle Huffington
- The Fabulous Gay from L.A.
Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Call us on our listener line: 206-666-4187
Thanks to Sweet Diss and the Comebacks (http://www.myspace.com/comebacks) for permission to use clips from "Dunder and Dwightning" as our theme music. Go buy their stuff, people!
DQYDJ Videocast 02: Ricky's Challenge
Posted on Tuesday, November 18, 2008 by Melanie
Welcome to Videocast 02 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Melanie takes possession of her brand new hat from DreamHats and answers Ricky from Foul Monkey's challenge (yeah, yeah, I know I said it was Taylor's challenge -- I'm sleep-deprived, people!) to sing in a video while wearing a hat. Enjoy!
Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Call us on our listener line: 206-666-4187
Hat courtesy of DreamHats.
Thanks to Sweet Diss and the Comebacks (http://www.myspace.com/comebacks) for permission to use clips from "Dunder and Dwightning" as our theme music. Go buy their stuff, people!
DQYDJ 49: Fruit Rollups For Jesus
Posted on Friday, November 14, 2008 by Melanie
Welcome to Episode 49 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Stacy wonders what a Cylon is, Patrick explains how he paid for college selling sperm, Jerry is with his love and Melanie talks about Tele-Tubby Porn.
- We have voicemail!
Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Call us on our listener line: 206-666-4187
Thanks to Sweet Diss and the Comebacks (http://www.myspace.com/comebacks) for permission to use clips from "Dunder and Dwightning" as our theme music. Go buy their stuff, people!
Posted on Thursday, November 13, 2008 by Stacy
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JERRY AND PATRICK!!!
Yes, it's Don't Quit Your Day Job's own Jerry and Patrick's birthdays this week!
Happy Birthday, guys!
Yes, it's Don't Quit Your Day Job's own Jerry and Patrick's birthdays this week!
Happy Birthday, guys!
DQYDJ 48: Yes We Did!
Posted on Wednesday, November 05, 2008 by Melanie
Welcome to Episode 48 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Melanie enjoys a frosty adult beverage, Stacy is without cable access due to President-Elect Obama, Patrick scores big on the riverboat, and Jerry runs over his iPhone.
- We have email!
- Scotty in Australia
- We have voicemail!
- Divy
- Luna
Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Call us on our listener line: 206-666-4187
Thanks to Sweet Diss and the Comebacks (http://www.myspace.com/comebacks) for permission to use clips from "Dunder and Dwightning" as our theme music. Go buy their stuff, people!
DQYDJ 47: Melanie Has A Lot of Sh*t
Posted on Sunday, November 02, 2008 by Melanie
Welcome to Episode 47 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Stacy is busy doing, well, something, Patrick announces the kickoff of his birthday month, Jerry is also busy doing, well, something, and Melanie is surrounded by boxes and is finally going to see WICKED.
Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Call us on our listener line: 206-666-4187
Thanks to Sweet Diss and the Comebacks (http://www.myspace.com/comebacks) for permission to use clips from "Dunder and Dwightning" as our theme music. Go buy their stuff, people!
DQYDJ 46: It's Not Sex -- It's Lovemaking
Posted on Sunday, November 02, 2008 by Melanie
Welcome to Episode 46 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Melanie is up to her ass in boxes, Stacy is covering the Voodoo Queen Summit in New Orleans, Patrick debates the best way to commemorate a beloved pet who has passed on, and Jerry's getting plenty.
- We have voicemail!
- Divy
Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Call us on our listener line: 206-666-4187
Thanks to Sweet Diss and the Comebacks (http://www.myspace.com/comebacks) for permission to use clips from "Dunder and Dwightning" as our theme music. Go buy their stuff, people!
