DQYDJ 125: Holidays From Hell

Posted on Thursday, December 16, 2010 by Melanie

(45:01 - 51.6 MB)


Welcome to the very special Christmas Episode of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Patrick is trying to throw a party and failing miserably, Jerry recalls a not-so-heartwarming Christmas memory, Melanie announces that she's carrying the Messiah (and his name is Superfly), Stacy recounts how her childhood belief in Santa was ruined by Melanie, and our special guest Scott is more than a little bemused.

We have voicemail!
Taffy Carlisle Huffington
Taylor the Latte Boy
Babaloo
Julian
Big Fatty
Ramble Redhead
Satyr69
Princess Honah

Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Send us voicemail: 206-338-3070


WE NEED A LITTLE MORE CHRISTMAS

CONKLIN'S BARN II
DINNER THEATRE
P.O. Box 310
Goodfield, IL 61742
(309) 965-2545
11/11/10 though 12/31/10

Touch-a Touch-a Touch-a Me, It's a Feature Of My Flight!

Posted on Saturday, December 04, 2010 by Melanie

I still want to bring singles and tuck them into the TSA's pants:

Wanna Write A Book? Watch This First.

Posted on Sunday, November 28, 2010 by Melanie

You have no idea how many times I've had this conversation with wannabe writers.

DQYDJ Videocast 08: Sin City, Part 2

Posted on Saturday, November 27, 2010 by Melanie

(4:35 - 53 MB)


Welcome to Videocast 08 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Melanie's continuing adventures in Sin City include a trip to Hoover Dam, too much time spent under the Daystar, a look at the Bellagio's gaming floor, and a most unexpected shower.



Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Call us on our listener line: 206-338-3070

DQYDJ Videocast 07: Sin City, Part 1

Posted on Saturday, November 27, 2010 by Melanie

(6:49 - 79.2 MB)


Welcome to Videocast 07 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Melanie goes to Las Vegas with the Bodacious Brit, checks into a mini suite at the Bellagio, takes a bath, sees a show, wanders the Strip, and gets hammered. Mother would be so proud.



Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Call us on our listener line: 206-338-3070

DQYDJ 124: Taffy's Vag

Posted on Saturday, November 27, 2010 by Melanie

(38:28 - 46.2 MB)


Welcome to Episode 124 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Stacy is too pooped to pop, Jerry experiences spillage, Patrick isn't impressed by MegaMind, and Melanie can't get her nouns straight.

We have email!
Terminally Single Tim
KFC

We have voicemail!
Taffy Carlisle Huffington

Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Send us voicemail: 206-338-3070


WE NEED A LITTLE MORE CHRISTMAS

CONKLIN'S BARN II
DINNER THEATRE
P.O. Box 310
Goodfield, IL 61742
(309) 965-2545
11/11/10 though 12/31/10

DQYDJ 123: Get The Fingering Right

Posted on Tuesday, November 16, 2010 by Melanie

(36:23 - 41.7 MB)


Welcome to Episode 123 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Melanie gets a cello and pimps Sherlock, Stacy is MIA, Jerry raves about his new MacBook Air, and Patrick drools over Jerry's new MacBook Air.

We have voicemail!
Margie
David That Blue Jeans Guy

Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Send us voicemail: 206-338-3070


WE NEED A LITTLE MORE CHRISTMAS

CONKLIN'S BARN II
DINNER THEATRE
P.O. Box 310
Goodfield, IL 61742
(309) 965-2545
11/11/10 though 12/31/10

Christmas Season Starts Now!

Posted on Thursday, November 11, 2010 by Pat Gaik

Conklin’s Barn II Dinner Theatre is happy to announce the opening of their holiday revue of music and comedy “We Need a Little MORE Christmas” opening Thursday November 11 and playing through January 2, 2011. Last year’s edition of the show was a near-total sell-out for the entire run, and this year’s reservations are filling up quickly, so patrons are encouraged to get their reservations as soon as possible.“We Need a Little MORE Christmas” will be an all new evening of music and laughter that will put the audience in the holiday mood and keep them there through songs, sketches and hilarious audience participation opportunities. The Revue will feature familiar traditional songs along with holiday songs from Broadway and Hollywood performed by a troupe of the Barn’s best merry-makers including Mary Simon, Dan and Tamra Challacombe, Pat Gaik, Dave Windsor, Chad Kirvan, Miranda Axsom, Diann Thompson and April Wyant. An all-new edition of last year’s hilarious game show will get audience members on stage to test their holiday knowledge as they compete for a special prize.

The production is directed by Mary Simon with choreography by Tamra Challacombe. The band features musical director Chad Kirvan on piano, with Al Hedstrom on bass and Zach Wakid on drums. Set design is by Tom Weber, technical direction is by April Wyant, and publicity is by Pat Gaik. Conklin’s Barn II is known for its delicious buffet which, on evening performances, includes four main entrees featuring the Barn’s renowned prime rib and fried chicken, with salad, homemade soup and cheese spread, and a choice of four taste-tempting, homemade desserts.


Prices for dinner and show are $33.00 on Thursday evenings, $35.00 on Friday evening and Sunday brunch, and $37.00 on Saturday evening, including tax. Wednesday evenings are added during the month of December, also priced at $33.00. There are no performances on Thanksgiving Day, Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. There is a special New Year’s Eve performance that features extras including a prize-filled balloon drop at midnight. No advance payment is required for regular performances.. For information or reservations, call the box office at 309-965-2545 or visit Conklin’s Barn II Dinner Theatre.

video

DQYDJ 122: Nazi Pussy

Posted on Monday, October 25, 2010 by Melanie

(39:33 - 45.4 MB)


Welcome to Episode 122 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Jerry visits the Big Huge Condiments Place, Melanie's writing is dissed by her cohosts, Stacy celebrates her birthday, and Patrick gets jumped with a lot of power.

We have email!
Divy
KFC

Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Send us voicemail: 206-338-3070


NOT NOW, DARLING
Watch the fur fly in this hilarious farce!

CONKLIN'S BARN II
DINNER THEATRE
P.O. Box 310
Goodfield, IL 61742
(309) 965-2545
9/16/10 though 11/7/10

We REALLY need these in red for Gay Days

Posted on Sunday, October 17, 2010 by Melanie

Mdm Lola is branching out, it seems

Posted on Sunday, October 17, 2010 by Melanie

Argument over goat sacrifice triggers stampede that kills 10 during festival in Indian temple



NOOOOOO! Not Nanny!

Repeating Dreams: or "What the hell is my subconscious pulling now?"

Posted on Wednesday, October 13, 2010 by Melanie

So I have this repeating dream where I'm in this three-story house. It's pretty unassuming, looks like the houses along Avenue O where I grew up, but there's something evil (ghost, demon, whatever) in the house that knows my family and absolutely hates me. I remember standing in what was some kind of foyer, looking straight up through a stained glass skylight into the attic, and knowing that whatever was up there wanted to absolutely destroy me. Not just kill me -- I'm talking wipe me from the fabric of existence, extinguish my soul, the whole kit and kaboodle. On occasion, it's taken the appearance of my maternal grandmother (who wasn't the cheeriest person in the world, granted, but wasn't a monster by any stretch of the term).

Over the last few years, dream logic has caused the house to be purchased by other people, and they're slowly renovating it. I'm happy to see this, because I know it's a nice house and someone should enjoy it, but I know that the thing in the attic is still there and still wants to obliterate me. In last night's dream, Stacy went into the house (she'd left something in there while visiting the new owners) and I had to go in there and physically pull her over the front porch railing before the TiTA attacked.

Oh, and the TiTA had decapitated a bunch of people and hung their heads, covered with masks, on the living room wall as Halloween decorations. Lovely.

Needless to say, I did not wake up in the best of all moods. If you like interpreting dreams, go for it.

DQYDJ Big in China

Posted on Tuesday, October 12, 2010 by Melanie

Apparently General Tso had friends -- who knew?

Thanks to Libsyn's new stats package, I can now see the download breakdown by country from 8/1/2010 to 9/22/2010. We appear to be rather popular in China, and for all the Brits downloading us, how many of you are related to me by marriage?

Country# of Downloads
United States1,080
China254
United Kingdom56
Canada16
Indonesia11
Hong Kong9
Australia8
Ireland7
France6
Japan3
Singapore3
Norway2
Thailand2
Hungary2
Korea, Republic of2
Belgium1
Switzerland1
Colombia1
Netherlands1

DQYDJ 121: Respect The Hoo-Hoo!

Posted on Tuesday, October 12, 2010 by Melanie

(37:09 - 44.6 MB)


Welcome to Episode 121 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Patrick discusses The Event, Jerry can be bought on Amazon AND Barnes & Noble, Melanie poses prettily with Jeff, and Stacy is somewhere in Illinois cooking dinner.


We have voicemail!
David That Blue Jeans Guy
DQ Rick

Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Send us voicemail: 206-338-3070


NOT NOW, DARLING
Watch the fur fly in this hilarious farce!

CONKLIN'S BARN II
DINNER THEATRE
P.O. Box 310
Goodfield, IL 61742
(309) 965-2545
9/16/10 though 11/7/10

Just back from Austin -- and NEVERMORE!

Posted on Sunday, October 03, 2010 by Melanie

So, what do these three women have in common?





As it turns out, they're all at the Original Alamo Drafthouse Cinema to see Jeffrey Combs in his one-man production of NEVERMORE, as part of the Austin Fantastic Fest film festival. Yes, I went to see NEVERMORE. Again. And a huge amount of thanks must go out to Holly Havens for 1) spotting the Fantastic Fest ad with the blurb about the show while in Austin for a stylist's convention and 2) letting her mother Theresa know about it, because Stretch then texted me with the info -- I was holding a printout of tickets ten minutes later. Not that I'm a fan or anything. Ahem.

Since I had ticket(s) plural and both Stretch and Lyndon had already seen the show, I called up my fellow Starfleet Ladies' Auxiliary and Embroidery/Baking Society member Fazia to see if she wanted to attend (she lives near Austin and is currently working on her acting career, so I figured she might want to see the stage show I'd been raving about for half of 2009). She did, met me at the theater in her gorgeous new black Stetson, and we wound up sitting in line next a charming young woman at the theater named Virginia who adored Jeff and happened to be into SF in a big way. Put three friendly geekettes together, and it's like a mini-con -- we spent the pre-show time happily chatting about Jeff, Star Wars, Star Trek, Connor Trinneer, old analog commercials, and other favorites. I even got a chance to speak briefly with Stuart Gordon before we went into the theater proper -- Virginia promptly scored a front row center seat (more about this in a minute), while Fazia and I took what I like to call the Helen Whitman Sweet Spot. :-) The show itself was fantastic as always (the seating layout was different from the Steve Allen Theater, which gave Jeff more of a chance to interact with the audience as Poe), and yeah, it's always fun to be addressed as "Helen" during the show.

Halfway through the show, however, it turned out that Virginia had a bit of a situation on her hands -- I'll let her tell it in her own words:

But half-way through the show, guess what? Oh, GOD, how I needed to PEEEEEE!!!! Shit shit shit, I’m thinking, and I waited until he finished one of his poems to make a mad dash to the bathroom, which was very very very hard to do, considering I was, like I said, five feet directly in front of the one performer on the stage and, subsequently, in the steady beam of the light, as well. But when you need to pee, YOU NEED TO PEE. So I crouched down and scampered. I quickly washed up and came back and he’s still talking, so I peel my eyes from him for a moment to see where I’m going as I slide down the row and find my seat. As I’m approaching my seat I begin to wonder why the theater has suddenly fallen so deathly silent, and as I slide into my seat I look up at Jeff to find him, frozen, half-way through taking off his jacket, and his eyes are fixated directly on me. His face fills out into a grin. “OH, SHIT,” my brain yells as I cover my face and start to giggle. The entire theater bursts out laughing as Jeff asks me, “Are you comfortable?” I can feel my whole face flood with colour and I manage a “Yes, sir, thank you” as he takes off his coat, still smiling at me and makes a kind remark about how funny it was.

After the show, Virginia said the magic words: "I want to get his autograph!" I really, REALLY wanted his autograph on my Steve Allen theater program and Faz was willing to stay, bless her heart, so we hung out for a bit while Jeff was de-wigged and nosed, then pretty much waylaid him in the hallway between the theaters, poor man. He really is an amazing trooper -- you can tell he's exhausted after the show, but he's still willing to sign autographs and take pictures with fans. And while I felt kind of guilty about asking him to pose -- well, I obviously didn't feel THAT guilty. And um, I may have asked him how the batteries were holding up in the room box. *innocent smile*




At which point he promptly threw me a curveball by asking me how the performance stacked up against the other ones I'd seen. After a moment of low blood sugar-induced vapor lock, I channeled my inner Ebert and gave him a fast analysis (more fast-paced and electric than the LA performances -- he thought it might have been because of the seating and the increased interaction with the audience). That really is one of the nifty things about seeing this play multiple times -- it keeps changing and evolving, so you always get something new with each performance. Oh, and he complimented me again on the room box, which pretty much was the cherry on an already awesome night.

But wait -- the fun doesn't stop there! Because I really was starting to fade out from hunger (note to self: eating a peanut butter sandwich for breakfast and then not eating anything for the next twelve hours isn't really that good of an idea), Fazia suggested that she, Virginia and I go out and grab dinner. After a fast check with Mr. Faz for local food recommendations, the three of us retired to a great diner called Kerbey Lanes and dug into some truly incredible chicken quesadillas, chips and salsa while trading stories, doing impersonations ("It's like BUTTAH!") and generally laughing our asses off for a good hour and a half. I knew I had to go into the office the next day, however, so I finally bid the ladies a fond farewell around 11 PM, ambled back to I-35 and pointed the Hoosiermobile north, grinning all the way home.

Hey Patrick!

Posted on Friday, October 01, 2010 by Melanie

We DO have a listener in Budapest! Don't know if that's Hat M, but if it is, he should write or call in.

DQYDJ 120: Flicking The Beaner

Posted on Thursday, September 30, 2010 by Melanie

(42:27 - 48.7 MB)


UPDATE: The sync problem is fixed, and my most humble apologies for the cock-up.

Welcome to Episode 120 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Stacy muses about what she wants on her tombstone ("Did you bring beer?"), Patrick plots Stacy's fiery death with Pabst Blue Ribbon and a jetpack, Jerry has a close encounter of the Slider kind, and Melanie prepares for her new gig of voicing Taffy Carlisle Huffington's clitoris by researching plush vulva puppets.


We have voicemail!
Kathy the Foreign Correspondent

Send us email: dqydjpodcast@gmail.com
Send us voicemail: 206-338-3070


NOT NOW, DARLING
Watch the fur fly in this hilarious farce!

CONKLIN'S BARN II
DINNER THEATRE
P.O. Box 310
Goodfield, IL 61742
(309) 965-2545
9/16/10 though 11/7/10