DQYDJ 68: My Mucus Is Green

Posted on Thursday, April 02, 2009 by Melanie

EP 68: My Mucus Is Green (40:18)

Welcome to Episode 68 of "Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Podcast!" where Jerry is in Finland drinking expensive coffee, Stacy exhorts Melanie to grow a spine already, Patrick tears us a new one, and Melanie is blowing out neon green mucus from her sinuses.

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Thanks to Sweet Diss and the Comebacks (http://www.myspace.com/comebacks) for permission to use clips from "Dunder and Dwightning" as our theme music. Go buy their stuff, people!

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  1. Pat Gaik |

    Any reason there's 10 minutes of silence at the end of this episode? Just askin'...

  2. Melanie |

    Well, at least it's at the END of the ep.

  3. David-That Blue Jeans Guy-Byrd |

    I didn't hear silence, and frankly, Pat, I completely resent the remarks you made about me. How dare you!

    I wrote that heartfelt sonnet with complete sincerity, having carefully crafted every word to express my true feelings. I am hurt that you cast aside my feelings so callously.

    I'm gonna go release my anger and anxiety by ripping the rotten boards off my patio and replacing them. Every time I pound a nail, I will be imagining your face on the head.

    Good day, sir!

  4. David-That Blue Jeans Guy-Byrd |

    In my fragile emotional condition I forgot to mention Stacy.

    I will shorthand this and say that you have a lot of nerve as well snickering at my literary efforts. We can't all be Shakespeares, you know...

    Melanie and Jerry...never mind. You know what you did, and it was very wrong...that's all I have to say.

  5. Stacy |

    1. I cant read shorthand.
    Try as I might to learn a second language I've just never been able to pick one up.

    2.Whats a Guy-Byrd and did you hang out in Capistrano with the swallows for the winter? Just wonderin...

    See, and this is exactly WHY you are not the next Shakespeare...because you cant spell.

    Everyone knows that bird is spelled B I R D....not Byrd.

    But, like...dont feel bad.
    Hell, if I could *read* more than the tv guide I'd be in good shape.

    Lastly if you are in a fragile mental state go over to the professional liscenced mental health expert at Pod Is My Co Pilot.

    Tell em Stacy sent you. Just dont mention yeast or anything ok?


  6. David-That Blue Jeans Guy-Byrd |

    Responding to Stacy's response:

    1. I'm trying to be nice and non-judgmental, so I'll let this one pass.

    2. If you notice, there is a hyphen that separates my first name from my alias and from my last name (my real name, incidentally). This dates back to the days when I used to use my real name in my podcast and I wanted people who knew me as "That Blue Jeans Guy" to know who this "David Byrd" guy was. Is this crystal clear now? :P

    As far as the spelling of my last name, it was a variant English spelling of the surname Bird. Here's the skinny from a surname search website:

    Last name origin & meaning:

    English: variant spelling of Bird.


    1. English and Scottish: from Middle English bird, brid ‘nestling’, ‘young bird’ (Old English bridd), applied as a nickname or perhaps occasionally as a metonymic occupational name for a bird catcher. The metathesized form is first found in the Northumbrian dialect of Middle English, but the surname is more common in central and southern England. It may possibly also be derived from Old English burde ‘maiden’, ‘girl’, applied as a derisory nickname.
    2. Irish: Anglicization of Gaelic Ó hÉanacháin or Ó hÉinigh, in which the first element (after Ó) has been taken as Gaelic éan ‘bird’ (see Heneghan).
    3. Jewish: translation of various Ashkenazic surnames meaning ‘bird’, as for example Vogel.


    I know you are just jelly in the face of my mad researching skills...

    Maybe your brother-in-law who hails from the same country as my ancestors can shed some light as to why his people modified the spelling of the name. Linden?

    I tried going to Pod Is My Copilot. Taylor still hasn't recovered from the horrible mental images I gave him. I mean, Taffy had to keep him from gouging out his own gray matter just to make the pain go away. Rodan was too busy getting jiggy with his latest internet dating site conquest to give any kind of helping hand...at least to me, that is.

    So, I'm back to venting all of my frustrations on you, since shopping options are limited when one is on unemployment, and eating ice cream is not good for the diabetes, and the sugar-free stuff...well...let's just say sugar alcohols are not my friend and leave it at that...

  7. Stacy |

    I have no idea what you are talking about....but I like ya anyway.

  8. David-That Blue Jeans Guy-Byrd |

    Ah, yes! Love and intense confusion. Success is mine!

    *evil laugh*

  9. Stacy |

    Did you get a day pass or something?

  10. Melanie |

    Lyndon is named after Lyndon Johnson. It's a long story.


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